Planes, Trains and Automobiles
Following the Reds on tour can be a complicated quest. Thankfully, it's been worth it.
Riddle me this…
There are some questions in life that are destined to remain unanswered.
How on Earth did Mrs Brown’s Boys become quite so popular? Why does every CEX store honk to high heaven despite only having unscented electric equipment on its shelves? Will Chequers Wine Bar ever put up a sign explaining you need a swimming certificate to enter and exit the bathroom?
These questions can be saved for greater minds than the mushy one that haphazardly slaps together this newsletter every week. But one noodle scratcher that is worth consideration is why following our mighty Reds on tour has turned into a race around the world?
The club posted online last week that many tickets for the fixture at Crawley had gone unclaimed - warning there would be no entry to anyone who turned up at Broadfield Stadium without a stub.
Wrexiles did not need reminding. For those no longer living locally, the fastest-fingers competition to claim a seat at away ties via Ticketmaster is only the first chapter of the odyssey. Every week, non-LL residents must embark on their own Planes, Trains and Automobiles style adventures from all four corners of the country for a 30-second visit to Y Cae Ras to grab a piece of paper that grants access to a stadium hundreds of miles in the other direction.
In the same week where Wrexham AFC proudly promoted its partnership with a tech giant, it was a little bizarre to see stories unfolding on the other side of social media about fans ditching work for the first of two trips required to attend away fixtures.
As some have rightly pointed out, Wrexham probably won’t have any control over the format in which they receive any allocated tickets for other stadiums. But marketing yourself as a shiny, global, digital club and then resorting to a collection system belonging to the days of Frogger and floppy disks is a bit like telling friends all about your lovely new house in Marford and then making them wait outside in the car instead of inviting them in for a cuppa and a Welsh Cake.
It makes you wonder whether there’s something we can do better here. A postal service? A club official who can offer a collection point for Reds at the ground? Maybe there are other options already in place, but if so, they’ve gone completely over many fans’ heads - a bit like Stockport County flying that banner above our ground in their title-winning season (we only know about it because they keep posting that bloody pic online).
When Reds have a hard enough time getting tickets for home games - a problem which will continue for at least another year due to minimal progress on the Kop - showing good-will to help out the outstandingly committed travelling Red Army wherever possible ought to be a high priority.
Hopefully it’ll get sorted someday: There is evidence the club have listened to supporters in the past by removing the much-maligned online queuing system. In any instance, at least all this nomad-ing been worth the hassle - as the recent footy has been more sensible.
Parky’s Reds had until last week taken a kamikaze approach to kickabouts - which given our gaffer’s track record for coy, conservative play has surely been a complete accident. It’s thrown up a real mixed bag of results to boot. But if the last three matches are anything to go by, Parky has finally managed to find a way to keep his Hollywood Heroes from charging into games like Leroy Jenkins.
The introduction of Big Arthur between the sticks ensured a big point at Mansfield mid-week, before another impressively stubborn defensive display a few days later at Crawley (even if Andy Cannon didn’t get the “careful today, lads” memo with a two-foot lunge) meant we came home from Sussex with a wonderful win.
We also walloped the trainspotters on their home turf with half a reserve team in the Takeaway Tournament with Premier League Toppings and got to watch JD dance through the Crewe defence like a Cymru Maradona in the process.
The table makes for fine reading. But we’re still none the wiser as to where we’ll end up. League Two is nuttier than squirrel droppings. Everyone is beating everyone (23rd-placed Sutton walloped table-toppers Notts County on opening day) and there’s just no telling who will come up trumps on any given weekend.
Trying to answer who will go up or down is in itself becoming a riddle. But at least we can enjoy the ride. Even if it does require a couple of extra journeys to see it all unfold in the flesh.